What Now?

I will be twenty-four years old this year. I don't subscribe to the illusion that at twenty-four there are perimeters of accomplishments, milestones and goals that you should or should not have achieved by this point in your life. However, the societal pressures on a young twenty-something female is not, in some ways, as crushing and worrisome as the pressures that we put on ourselves.
In the midst of a political, economical, environmental, humanitarian and ethical shit storm that has globally blanketed a toxic smog of unease and division and tainted much of the beginning of 2017, I'm supposed to be taking stock of all that I am, done and have to work out what in the world I am to do with my time.
No pressure?
I am twenty-three. I am female. I am straight. I am white. I am polite, kind, compassionate and I swear a lot. I am petite and lean. I am Welsh. And I am English. I am smart. I am silly. I am cautious, unsure and distrusting. I am right handed.

I did well in school. I completed my degree. I can drive. I grew up in a nice area, with a kind, loving and modest family. I have traveled. I have never broken a bone. I have made friends and kept them. I've had relationships and left them.

I have plants. I have three dogs. I have books. I have eyes, ears and a brain. I have loving parents. I have two sisters. I have a job. I have hobbies and interests, likes and dislikes. I have a garden, and my own bedroom. I have Facebook. And Snapchat.

Really, I am very ordinary. I am the typical. I am the majority, the privileged. But no matter how many times I play this through my head, I know myself no better. A much as I know what I am, have and have done, there is far more that I do not know, certain things that I do not have, things of which I'm unsure.
I don't think I've ever had 'dreams'. Not real ones. I don't know my blood type. I don't know what I want. I'm unsure of my passions. I don't know how to play poker. I don't know how best to utilise my skills. I don't have a favourite colour. I am without faith. I don't have a brother. I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing. I don't know what my contract says in my current job.
I don't think setting myself goals, giving myself a time frame or trying to fit my life into predetermined, tidy, labelled little boxes is the right way to go. But drifting to the point of floundering is no good either. I think being aware should do the trick. Taking stock, in my own time. Calculating with little expectation of the answer. Letting life be, with a touch of supervision.